Tuesday. June 23. 1987. Grand Haven. Michigan. Dinnertime. Distracted by a commercial for Predator on TV, Papa Smith elbowed a potted plant while carving the pot roast. In a desperate attempt to catch the falling fern, Veronica tipped her ice tea. Startled by his sister’s sudden lunge across the table, Jebediah flipped his dinner plate. Baby Elsa spilled her milk just because (she was like that). All of it splattered onto the dining room carpet. Cousin Emily thought it was so funny that she sprayed orange juice right out of her nose.
Was Momma Smith concerned? Was she immediately searching the Yellow Pages (that’s an ancient form of Google) for carpet cleaners, praying that they could arrive before it was too late? Was she running around the house, flailing her arms, screaming, “Oh, the horror! Oh, the horror?” No way, man. She was totally cool. MacGyver cool. Her carpet and upholstery had been Scotchgarded after her home’s last cleaning a month beforehand. She just grabbed a roll of paper towels and calmly set her family to blotting their respective messes (see video).
This devastating and inevitable scenario plays out (exactly as I have written it, although the names sometimes change) in households all across North America every day. Unfortunately, unlike Momma Smith of West Michigan in the late eighties, not every victim of dinnertime carpet carnage walks away unscathed. Because the carpet of these homes had not been treated with Scotchgard, their carpets forever bare the scars of those fateful evenings.
Don’t let this happen to you, friends. Scotchgard is available to you and works like the nonstick coating of your frying pan, creating a protective barrier which prevents most spills from soaking in to your carpet fibers (think of it like laying a tarpaulin over your carpet, only more aesthetically pleasing). Cleaning up spills afterwards is usually as simple as soaking them up with a clean towel. Because of this protection, your cleaning will last longer, and you’ll save money since you won’t have to call in a professional if and when a family meal goes awry.
Your carpet was probably Scotchgarded as a part of the manufacturing process, and it doesn’t evaporate, but it does get rubbed off by foot traffic after about a year. If it has been more than a year since you bought your carpet or had it Scotchgarded after a cleaning, you are due. Call and schedule your cleaning today and insist on Scotchgard. In the meantime, consider relocating the potted plants currently located at elbow level in your home. You never know when a pot roast carving incident may escalate.